The Real Meaning Of Success: Why Failure Is The Secret

Table of Contents

Introduction: The Great Misunderstanding of Success

“Everyone wants to succeed, but very few understand what success really is.”

How Society Defines Success (and Why It’s Misleading)?

In today’s fast-moving world, success is one of the most chased dreams—but also the most misunderstood one. For most people, success equals money, power, fame, or academic degrees. That’s the image we’ve been sold from childhood, in movies, in schools, and even by our families. But is that really the real meaning of success?

The Mental Gap: 21st Century Living, Outdated Thinking

We live in the 21st century physically, but mentally, much of society is still stuck in outdated, conservative thinking. And this isn’t about a particular country like India, the US, Russia, or the UK—this is a global issue. But here’s the truth: society isn’t a separate force. Society is us—individuals. And now, more than ever, we must pause and reflect on what we believe success truly means.

A Question No One Asks: What If the Rich Man Has No Heart?

The problem? The definition of success has been set by the wrong intentions and shallow perspectives. When we think of someone as successful, our minds often jump to external achievements—wealth, social status, job titles. But let me ask you this:

What if someone earns millions but has lost compassion, peace, or purpose—can we still call that success?

This Is Not a Definition—It’s a Realization

“This article is not a definition. It’s a realization.”

I’m not here to sell another textbook meaning of success or confuse students and readers further. Instead, this article is a realization—a moment to break out of the limited thinking patterns that we were taught in school or absorbed from society.

Yes, it may be difficult to believe something different from what we’ve heard all our lives. But unless we start questioning what we know, we will keep living someone else’s version of success.

What This Article Will Give You?

By the end of this article, I promise you one thing:

You’ll walk away with a deeper understanding of success—something that no school has ever taught, but life has tried to show us again and again.

What is the Real Meaning of Success?

Success Is Not a Destination—It’s a Lifetime Journey

Most of us are taught in school and our environment that success is a destination—a point we must reach to be called “successful.” But this mindset is where we go wrong.
Real success is not a finish line you cross; it is a journey you walk throughout your life.

Think of legends like Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam, Ratan Tata, and Nelson Mandela. None of them defined success as reaching a single milestone. Their lives were a continuous journey of learning, failing, improving, and impacting others.

How I Define True Success?

To me, success is not measured by external achievements like money or status—it is about inner fulfillment and growth. Real success involves:

Peace of mind: If you have wealth but no peace, can you call it success? Success is meaningless if your mind is constantly restless.
Inner growth: A true winner grows till their last breath.
Self-mastery: Success comes when you control your emotions, habits, and mindset.
Learning from setbacks: Every failure is a teacher.
Impacting others: A truly successful person lights up other people’s paths with wisdom, kindness, and inspiration.

As Earl Nightingale once said, “Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal.” While I agree, I believe success is more than realizing an ideal—it is living a life of purpose, resilience, and contribution.

What Success Feels Like?

Success means doing what you love while staying true to yourself.
Success means finding your purpose and committing your life to it.
Success means having a vision of what you want to become and taking small steps every day to get there.
Success means stepping outside your comfort zone, embracing challenges, and becoming stronger through them.
Success means feeling fulfilled after a day’s work, knowing you made a positive impact on someone’s life.

Success = Failure: The Fear That Holds Us Back

Here’s what I’ve realized:
Success = Failure.
When success is seen as a destination, people fear failure so much that they give up. They think, “If I fail, I’m not successful.”

But the truth is this:

If we never fail, we never succeed.
Failure teaches us lessons that success alone cannot.

For example:

When a child touches a hot iron, they immediately pull their hand back. That pain (failure) teaches them not to repeat the same mistake.
When we learn cycling, we fall many times before balancing. That failure trains us to master the cycle.

Failure is not the opposite of success—it is part of the journey toward it.

Success = Rust: The Danger After “Arrival”

There’s another side to this. Some people achieve their goals and believe they’ve “arrived.” They stop growing. They stop challenging themselves.

This is where success turns into rust.

Just like iron rusts when left idle, people lose their drive, creativity, and purpose when they think success is permanent.
For example, someone may earn billions and decide to “rest” because they feel they’re done. But that rest soon turns into stagnation and decay.

Why You Must Define Success for Yourself?

Society often defines success as wealth, fame, or luxury. But these are surface-level goals.
True success is personal. It’s different for everyone. If you chase someone else’s definition, you will always feel unsatisfied.

Ask yourself:

What makes me truly happy?
What inspires and fulfills me?
What areas of life do I excel in?
What legacy do I want to leave behind?
Who do I look up to, and why?
What matters most to me?

Your answers will guide you toward your own definition of success.

Why I Say: “Success = Failure”.

“Success is not the opposite of failure. It is built on failure.”

Most people see failure as the end of their journey, but the truth is, failure is the foundation on which success stands. Every setback teaches us something that success never can. Failure is the training ground, the battlefield where we develop strength, resilience, and wisdom.

The Farmer and God Story: Why Struggles Are Necessary?

Whenever I talk about success = failure, a powerful story comes to my mind:

There was once a farmer who constantly cursed God. He would say,

“Why don’t you send rain on time? Why don’t you give the right amount of sun? My crops are suffering because of you!”

One day, God appeared before him and asked, “Why do you blame me all the time?” The farmer replied, “If I had your power, I would grow the perfect crops without any problems.”

God smiled and said, “Fine, I will give you the power to control everything—rain, sun, wind, everything your farm needs.”

The farmer, full of ego, accepted the challenge. He provided perfect weather, perfect rain, and perfect sunshine. The crops grew beautifully. But when harvest time came, he was shocked—

there were no grains inside the crops!

He went to God, confused and upset:
“I gave them everything perfect! Why did my crops fail?”

God replied:

“You gave them comfort, but not struggle. You gave them care, but not the storms and rains that make them strong. Without challenges, they never learned to fight or grow deep roots. That is why they failed.”

The moral:

Without failure, there is no strength. Without challenges, there is no real success.

Failure Is the Price of Real Success

We often forget that failure is not the opposite of success—it is the path to it.

Thomas Edison failed more than 1,000 times before inventing the lightbulb.
Steve Jobs was fired from Apple, the company he founded, only to return later and make it the tech giant we know today.
K. Rowling faced rejection by 12 publishers before Harry Potter became a global phenomenon.

The truth is simple:

If you are afraid to fail, you will never truly succeed.

The Problem With Our Education System

Schools Teach Success Wrong

Our school ecosystem has always praised the “top rankers”—students who score first division or secure high marks. They get awards, certificates, and applause. But what about the student who fails in Class 9?
Is he suddenly labeled a “failure”?
This burden of being called a failure often leads to stress, depression, and anxiety.

The biggest flaw in our system is that schools give a theoretical definition of success but never teach the process of achieving it.

No one teaches us that failure is a stage of learning and feedback—not the end.

Failure Is Not the Enemy

Failing in school or college does not mean a person will never succeed. Life is filled with failures at every step:

When a toddler learns to walk, he falls repeatedly—but that failure teaches him to take the first step.
When we learn to ride a bicycle, we fall and get hurt. But falling teaches us balance.
If failing is so natural in life, why don’t schools teach us how to embrace failure as a stepping stone?

The Wrong Definition of Success

From childhood, we are told that success = grades + ranks + a high-paying job.
Movies and advertisements reinforce this lie, showing only wealth, luxury, and comfort as signs of success.
But the truth is, these things don’t define a successful life. A person can have all the riches in the world and still feel empty.

The Real-Life Skills We Never Learn

Our schools and colleges ignore the real-life skills that truly create success:

Resilience: How to rise after failing.
Risk-taking: How to step out of the comfort zone.
Failure-handling: How to use setbacks as lessons instead of giving up.

Imagine if we were taught these skills instead of rote memorization—how different our lives would be.

Misunderstandings Around Success in Today’s World

The Social Media Illusion: Wealth = Success?

In today’s world, social media has become the biggest stage for fake success. We scroll through our feeds and see luxury cars, expensive vacations, branded clothes, and think—

“This person must be successful.”

But 90% of what we see online is carefully curated show-off, not reality. Many influencers rent luxury cars and fake lifestyles just for a photo. This illusion of wealth has brainwashed people into believing that success means having material things to flaunt.

The Rise of Hustle Culture and Comparison

We are constantly told: “Work 24/7. No pain, no gain. Keep grinding until you make it.”
While hard work is important, hustle culture creates toxic pressure. It makes people feel like they are failing if they aren’t constantly achieving something.

On top of that, comparison kills happiness. We compare our real lives with someone else’s highlight reel on social media—and feel like we are behind in life.

Looking Successful vs. Being Successful

These days, the focus has shifted from being successful to looking successful.

People buy things they can’t afford just to post online.
They chase likes, comments, and validation instead of real achievements.
They create a false image while losing their true identity.

True success is quiet. It doesn’t need validation. It is about inner fulfillment, not social approval.

The Hidden Cost of Fake Success

When people chase this illusion, they:

Feel empty and unhappy even if they appear successful online.
Waste energy trying to impress others instead of growing themselves.
Lose sight of what success really means.

**What Success Really Demands (Unspoken Truths)?**

Success Is a Journey, Not a Shortcut

The first thing we must understand is simple but powerful:

Success is a journey not a destination.

And this journey is long. It is not a superfast race with shortcuts or hacks. To achieve true success, you must be prepared to walk the path with patience, consistency, and resilience.

The Power of Patience and Consistency

Patience: Nothing great is built overnight. We often overestimate what we can do in a week but underestimate what we can achieve in a year with persistence.
Consistency: Showing up every day, even when you don’t see results, builds strength. This consistency slowly transforms into self-discipline, which becomes your biggest weapon.

Every small effort compounds over time—like drops filling an ocean.

Sacrifice: The Price of Progress

Success requires sacrifice. It means cutting off distractions, toxic habits, and even comfort zones. You have to give up certain “wrongs” in your daily routine—time-wasting habits, negative people, or instant gratification—to make space for growth.

Knowledge + Application = Skills (The 5 Buckets Concept)

As Steven Bartlett shares in his book The Diary of a CEO, success is built on strong foundations—two of the most critical being:

Knowledge (what you learn)
Skills (how you apply that knowledge)

Knowledge without application is wasted potential. When you apply what you learn, it turns into skills, and these skills form the true backbone of success.

Building a Valuable Life

To build this foundation, we all must add at least one knowledge source into our daily lives. It could be:

Reading books
Learning music or singing
Writing blogs
Practicing a craft or skill

Anything that adds value to your life will make you valuable—and being valuable is the core of real success.

Final Thoughts: Redefine Success Before You Chase It

If You Don’t Define Success, the World Will Do It for You

“If you don’t define your own success, the world will do it for you—and you’ll always feel like a failure.”

This is the ultimate truth. If you allow society, social media, or others to define success for you, you’ll forever feel like you’re falling behind—no matter how much you achieve.

Success Is Deeply Personal

Real success cannot be copied, compared, or measured by someone else’s journey. It is about:

Living with peace of mind
Growing every single day
Contributing value to the world around you

Reflect Before You Chase

Before you run after titles, money, or validation, stop and ask yourself:

What truly makes me feel fulfilled?
What legacy do I want to leave?
What does success mean to me, not the world?

When you create your own definition of success, life becomes simpler, clearer, and deeply meaningful.

Break Free From False Definitions

You don’t have to live someone else’s version of success. You don’t need to prove your worth by flashy achievements. True success is quiet, humble, and purpose-driven.

Final Note

This article is not about giving you a new “definition” of success, but about helping you realize that success is a lifelong journey of growth, learning, and impact. Define it for yourself, and you’ll never feel like you’re chasing an illusion.

“Real success is invisible at first. It’s forged in the dark, when no one is watching, in the moments you rise again after falling.”